A juice bar should have juice.

Ohhhh, boy!  Here goes a rant.  So, I went to Sawgrass Mills Mall yesterday, and had the misfortune of trying to order juice at a juice bar.  What a mistake that was.  I used to be so naive as to think that a juice bar would be the perfect place to get a nice, fresh cup of juice.  Apparently, juice bars are places where you buy smoothies, salads, pastries, coffees, paninis...pretty much anything but juice.

Or, at least that was the case with Rio Station Juice Bar.  I asked if I could order a juice, assuming that maybe the menu excluded juice simply because there would be no need to inform people that there was juice available at a juice bar.  The obviously disoriented cashier said something along the line of "yes, um, juice, um, smoothie, um, juice, um, banana hammock," or something like that.  So, I asked for a grande watermelon and strawberry juice and reiterated that I did not want a smoothie.

Only 15 minutes later, after battling a fly and doing the samba with the other five people in line at this treasure, I was the proud owner of a watermelon and strawberry smoothie!  Just in case you were thinking of spending your day in a gigantic mall, just to defraud Rio Station Juice Bar out of a smoothie that you didn't pay for...don't even think about it!  As I quickly learned, every employee will individually review your receipt for authenticity before the reluctant blender-technician hands you the smoothie you kind of ordered, but really didn't.

The smoothie was delicious, by the way.  But, a juice bar should have juice.  I'll never go back.

Delius Restaurant - Long Beach, California: Awesome Vegetarian Fare

Wouldn't you know it?  After blasting house salads, I find a restaurant with an amazing house salad!  Delius Restaurant, in Long Beach, California, is a local gem.  I decided to keep true to my mission by reviewing a restaurant that offers food for everyone.  I was not disappointed.

Right near Long Beach Airport, at 2951 Cherry Avenue, lies Delius Restaurant.  It offers a full lunch, dinner, and kids menu, as well as a full bar.  The decor and overall atmosphere is modern and somewhat intimate.  This place does a great job welcoming business people, couples and families, alike.  The restaurant is a decent size, unlike the airport, and the prices are reasonable for California (perhaps a bit pricey for some, with entree prices ranging from $13 - $32.  There are five vegetarian offerings, and a couple of them can be vegan.  I tried the House Salad, Chipotle Macaroni and Cheese, and the Penne Puttanesca.  I did not try the Spinach Mascarpone Risotto or the Four Cheese Pizza, because there's only so much room in the tank.

Let me start off by saying that the House Salad is incredible, but, it is not the "house salad" you're accustomed to - European greens with candied walnuts, red onion, red grapes, cherry tomatoes, crumbled blue cheese and a rosemary infused balsamic vinaigrette.  It is not going to stuff you, but it is enough for a delicious light meal.  The only possible objection I could see someone having to this one is that the candied walnuts have a cinnamon overtone, which was somewhat of an odd flavor for a salad.  I loved it, though.  The greens were fresh and the bleu cheese was mild.


I tried an appetizer portion of the Chipotle Macaroni and Cheese, but there is a dinner portion and meat-eaters can add shrimp or Andouille sausage.  Assuming Andouille isn't a synonym for soy, I had it plain.  But, there was nothing "plain" about this Macaroni and Cheese.  It comes out piping hot and is incredible.  If you are lactose intolerant, this stuff may kill you.  It is cheesy.  The chipotle isn't offensive (I was really worried) and offers a vague hint of spice, which works wonders.  I highly recommend it.


The Penne Puttanesca came in a trough.  I could only eat half of my portion.  I really liked it, and enjoyed the capers, and olives.  The only surprise there was that it was a bit spicy.  I love spice, but it was much spicier than most meals that aren't traditionally considered spicy food, so be warned.  Beforehand, I also tried the Carrot and Fennel soup.  This soup was good.  It could have been better, if the fennel flavor was a bit stronger, but I cleaned the bowl nonetheless.


All in all, I strongly recommend Delius Restaurant.  Great food and service.  If you are flying into or out of Long Beach, or just in the area, give this place a try.  You won't be disappointed.  For more info: www.deliusrestaurant.com.

Gag me with a house salad.

If I had a nickel for every time I got invited to some cookie-cutter, meat-infested, casual dining craphole (if it's not a word, it is today) and told "you can have a house salad," I would use all of those nickels to buy a Bob Marley autographed guitar to bash the next person to offer me a house salad over the head.

I don't have a problem with house salads, per se, but I do have a problem with the fact that someone would invite me to eat with them while caring so little about my taste buds that they think a bowl of half-wilted iceberg lettuce, a cucumber slice, and three cherry tomatoes was going to be an enjoyable dinner.

I won't stand for it anymore, and you shouldn't either!  It is our duty as vegetarians to inform our friends, family and colleagues that we do have sophisticated palates, too.  Most vegetarians do not graze in a field.  We like variety as much as any carnivore and don't eat salads all day.  If I do have a salad for dinner, it is going to be a dinner salad, and it better have some nice, fancy stuff all over it, like craisins, apples, walnuts, artichokes or something else yummy.  If it's not on a dinner-sized plate, it's not a dinner.

Ok.  I'm done ranting.  Wow!  I could really go for a salad right now. How ironic? :-/

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Unhealthy Vegetarians

I've known some fat, unhealthy vegetarians.  Now, I'm not at my physical peek, but I'm relatively healthy.  There are some goofballs out there that think that you can't be healthy if you don't eat meat.  That's stupid.  But, most people tend to think that it is hard for a vegetarian to be unhealthy.  That's not quite stupid, but it is very wrong.

I used to be like most people in the world.  I used to spend my days dragging my knuckles on the ground, eating slabs of charred dead animals and driving around in my Hummer looking for small animals to run over.  My gut hung way over my belt line (I wasn't even wearing a belt) and I couldn't remember the last time I bathed.  Then, I became a vegetarian.  NOTHING CHANGED.

I wondered, "how can I still be a grotesque, loathsome beast when I don't even eat carcass anymore?"  The answer, of course, is that meat isn't the only thing that keeps a person from discovering their inner supermodel.  I realized that you not only have to stop eating unhealthy foods, but you must begin to eat healthy foods.  Once I figured out that balance was key, I shed hundreds of unwanted pounds, grew thick, beautiful hair only where I wanted it, and began emitting a pleasant scent, at will.

Some of the facts of my metamorphosis may be a little off, as it has been so long and my memory is hazy, but you get the point.  Avoiding empty calories and eating lots of fruits and vegetables is the obvious, and most often ignored, path to good health.  The best way to eat the right balance is to eat a variety of colors every day.  Here is a link to a good article about the colors of fruits and vegetables, and their health benefits (ignore the fleshy meal suggestions):

http://www.ag.ndsu.edu/pubs/yf/foods/fn595w.htm#reasons

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Vegetarian Web Presence

Obviously, I eat at restaurants all the time.  I also travel quite a bit.  I find it so difficult to find vegetarian food when I go places.  Sure, there are guides to vegetarian eating, and they are great.  But, for some reason, I find the best places through word-of-mouth and not on the web.  Why is that?

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that vegetarian restaurants tend to be small "mom and pop" type establishments.  They are often way more worried about the food that they are preparing than they are about their advertising.  This is good and bad.  While these places may enjoy a great following at first, due to the fact that vegetarians are always trying to find new places, once the novelty wears thin or another restaurant opens, they often go out of business.

Also, major restaurants do absolutely nothing to promote their vegetarian selections.  You never see advertisements for a meatless offering from any of the popular casual dining establishments, but most of them do offer something.  This, I believe, is because they do not value the business that these items bring.

I don't have an answer to this one.  This was more or less a rant.  I do think that vegetarians and vegans ought to do their best to encourage restaurants to build their web presence and to promote their vegetarian selections online.  The more this is done, the more other places will get the hint and develop their menus to include us herbivores.

That's it.  I'm done.  Feel free to weigh in.

Vegetarian Tacos...fast, easy and yummy!!!

I love vegetarian tacos.  I'm eating them tonight, as a matter of fact.  They are fast, easy and oh so good.  They can be pretty healthy, too.  Here's what I do, but you can go nuts with these.

Note:  This is not a recipe.  This is more like an idea for you to put together your own recipe.

1. I get Morningstar Farms Veggie Crumbles and saute' them with garlic, salt, pepper (black and cayenne), and, sometimes, a taco seasoning packet.  If you prefer Boca crumbles or another kind, do it.  I'm not the boss of you.
2. I bake a mess of taco shells.  I prefer Ortega, but will make whichever brand is on sale, because I'm cheap.  I also heat up some soft tortillas.
3. Then, I fill my tacos and add whichever delicious ingredients I want that night.  These can include cheese (real or soy), guacamole, salsa, cilantro, pico de gallo, shredded lettuce, pretty much whatever you like.
4. Then, I douse it all with hot sauce because I hate my intestines.

That's it.  I love it.  My family loves it.  My friends love it.  You'll love it.  If you come up with anything else interesting to add, let me know.  I'm always down to try some new grub.

I'm the reason your girlfriend likes tofu.

My posts are probably way too cynical.  You probably all have great friends who respect your dietary decisions and encourage your healthy lifestyle.  I don't.  My friends are jerks.  I get ridiculed at every turn.  When we are out to eat, they make a point of ordering as much meat as possible.  Then, they tell me how good every bite is.

I can deal with that.  It might have been difficult at first, but now I just laugh it off and strike back when I can.  What I can't deal with is when they question my hetero-credentials.  Now, for all of the non-hetero readers out there, don't take any offense.  I'm okay with whatever floats your banana boat.  But, the assumption that all vegetarian men are playing for the other team are far from accurate.  In fact, vegetarianism exemplifies many characteristics that females look for in men, such as:

1. Healthy Living:  Every woman wants a man who cares about his body (because she cares about his body).
2. Self-Discipline:  One of the biggest complaints women make about men is that they lack control and discipline.  You must have discipline if you can stop eating meat. (hahaha)
3. Sensitivity:  Vegetarians are characterized as having a lot of concern for the environment and animal-welfare.  Women tend to love that stuff. Yay!
4. Trendiness:  Vegetarianism is often looked at as a subculture.  Subcultures are a rebellion against the norm, and rebellion is cool.  Women look at vegetarian men as a different kind of bad boy.

So, please, if you are a man and are interested in vegetarianism, don't let your guy friends peer-pressure you not to.  Just give it a shot and take their girlfriends. :)